Make friendship

How to make friends?
1. Be interested in others: Everyone likes to love and to be loved, recognized, listened. Ways to attract are: writing, speaking, initiating, wishing without forgetting their B’days..,talking in terms of others interests, treating others as the most important persons, calling by names, etc.
If you want others to like you, if you want to develop real friendships, if you want to help others at the same time as you help yourself, keep this principle in mind: Become genuinely interested in other people.
2. Do things for other people. “There is nothing good or bad, but thinking makes it so”. Shake spear. If you think good about somebody it will be expressed in your words, acts and attitudes& vice versa.
Henry Ford as asked ‘‘who is your best friend?” He replied, “ One who brings out of you what is best in you”.
3. Speak to people- Greetings, Each one is really waiting for a start. Remaining in room/office not only is lonely, but it denies one the opportunity of making friends. You can’t expect people come to you, you have to go out and meet. Because of this starting trouble we loose so many good people.
4. Smile at people. Your smile is a message of your good will. It brings people close to you, brings hope, happiness& the countersign of friendship. You will become health and free person. Chinese Proverb goes like this, “A man without a smiling face must not open a shop”. It costs nothing but creates much.
5. Call people by their name. The sweetest music to anyone’s ears is the sound of his own name. It is the magic to influence people. The name sets the individual apart; it makes him or her unique among all others, From the waitress to the senior executive, the name will work magic as we deal with others.
6. Make the other person feel important- and do it sincerely; “ Talk to people about themselves,” said Disraeli. Talk to people about themselves and they will listen for hours. Be a good listener. Encourage people to talk about themselves. Talk in terms of others interest. Be a wiser than people if you can; but do not tell them so.
“One thing only I know, and that is that in know nothing” Socrates.
Each one is a priceless book with rich treasure in it, unravel it. The more you know about a person, and then there is more to know.
The reason why rivers and seas receive the homage of a hundred mountain streams is that they keep below them. Thus you are able to reign over all the mountain streams.e.g. Sages.
7. Be cordial: The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it don’t argue but discuss. Do as you do to you. Show respect for the other person’s opinion. Never say, “you are wrong”. Use a little diplomacy. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically. Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
8. Be genuinely interested with praises: Cautious with criticism, praise in public and criticize in private. “ The desire to be great”(Freud) “The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.”(William James).
9. Be considerate with feelings of others. Empathize with others feelings, problems, emotions and respect their feeling &don’t judge whether that feeling is appropriate or not. This is the way s\he feels. Don’t try solve to solve the problem but the person. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
10. Be thoughtful of the opinions of others. 3 sides- your opinion, other’s and the right one. Neither over estimate your opinion nor under estimate others.
11. Learn from others: “Every man I meet is my superior in some way. In that, I learn of h/her.” If it is true of Emerson , isn’t it likely to be a thousand times more true of you and me? Let’s cease to think of our accomplishments, our wants. See things in others point of view & your own. Be alert to give advice. Try to learn from others than imposing your ideas, you are not superior to anybody, inferior to anybody, but equal and unique.

12. An attitude of let-go. Attitude of giving(Geethanjali no.50). sacrificing mentality. IT is the individual who is not interested in his fellow men who has the greatest difficulties in life and provides the greatest injury to others, It is from among such individuals that all human failures spring- Alfred Adler, in his book “What life should mean to you